Sappho's Friends is a community for queer women, non-binary and trans people. Our core values include accessibility, inclusion and intersectional feminism.

1. Purpose and Scope

This document outlines the ethical principles and behavioral expectations that guide all events and community spaces hosted by Sappho's Friends, a queer-centered organization for queer women, non-binary people and trans people of all genders.

These guidelines apply to everyone involved—organizers, volunteers, collaborators and participants—across all in-person and digital spaces.

Our values are rooted in:

• Accessibility
• Anti-oppression
• Consent
• Intersectionality
• Accountability

We aim to co-create spaces that are safer, inclusive, and liberatory for those most marginalized within queer communities.

2. Core Values

Accessibility is a right, not a bonus:
We aim to make our spaces physically, socially, economically, digitally, and emotionally accessible. Accessibility includes but is not limited to: step-free access, low-sensory environments, translation/interpretation, financial inclusion and respect for all communication and processing styles.

Consent and Boundaries Are Non-Negotiable:
Consent must be clear, enthusiastic, and ongoing. This applies to physical contact, conversation topics, photographs, emotional labor, and participation in any activity.

Intersectionality and Anti-Oppression:
We recognize that different forms of oppression are connected and rarely occur on their own. Be mindful that inequity can show up in many ways—not only through gender, but also through race, ethnicity, class, religion, and more. We try our best to design our practices with an understanding of how these systems of power overlap and affect people’s everyday experiences.

3. No Harassment, Discrimination, or Abuse

Harassment, Discrimination, or Abuse, can be but is not limited to:

• Repeatedly ignoring someone’s boundaries
• Misgendering, deadnaming, or outing someone without consent
• Making racist, sexist, ableist, transphobic, or otherwise discriminatory comments
• Unwanted flirting, touching, or sexual comments
• Non-consensual photography or filming
• Mocking or dismissing someone’s access needs, culture, or way of communicating
• Gaslighting, manipulation, or abuse of social or organizational power

These behaviors are harmful regardless of intent. This applies to all Sappho’s Friends events and spaces. Any issue of serious harm or conflict happening outside of Sappho’s Friends by our members may have an impact on our community and events. The board will be the one in charge of reviewing these situations in alignment with the Ethical Guidelines.

4. Community Expectations

Respect Self-Determination:
Always respect how people define themselves. This includes their names, pronouns, identities, relationships, and needs.

Give and Make Space:
Be mindful about the space you take up. Step up if you’re able to support others or call something out.

Practice Active Listening:
Listen to understand, not to respond. Be open to correction and feedback without becoming defensive.

Use Inclusive Language:
Avoid assumptions and generalizations. Use gender-neutral and culturally respectful language whenever possible. And if unsure of how to refer to someone, ask in a considerate manner.

Take accountability:
Intent does not erase impact. If you hurt someone, even unintentionally, take accountability, apologize and adjust your behavior.

5. Accountability & Action

Everyone in our spaces has a shared responsibility to uphold these values. If you witness or experience a violation of these guidelines—whether it’s a moment of microaggression or a serious breach—you are encouraged to take action in a way that feels safe and supportive.

You can:

• Interrupt the behavior directly (if it feels safe)
• Check in with the person affected and offer support
• Inform a volunteer or organizer during the event
• Submit a “varsel” (notification) by email. This will be treated confidentially.

Handling of “Varsler” (Notifications or Formal Complaints)

If a formal complaint (varsel) is submitted, the board of Sappho’s Friends is the designated body responsible for:

• Receiving and reviewing the “varsel”
• Ensuring confidentiality, fairness and safety for all involved parties
• Following up with all relevant individuals in a timely manner
• Taking appropriate action based on the severity of the case
• Ensuring the board takes appropriate measures to avoid conflicts of interest

This may include:

• Facilitating dialogue or mediation (with consent)
• Issuing verbal or written warnings
• Restricting or removing individuals from events, roles and/or digital channels
• Restricting or removing individuals from Sappho’s Friends if needed
• In case the individual(s) has overlap with partnership organizations, confidentiality will be lifted to notify such organisations, however only when it is strictly necessary and with limited insight into sensitive details. All involved parties will be notified beforehand
• Referring the case to public authorities if needed. This is included but not limited to the physical or sexual assault, threats of violence, ongoing abuse or harassment that poses a safety risk, using of illegal substances if serious or endangering others. We understand that public authorities do not always share our values or intentions. We will only engage with them as a last resource, and only when it is absolutely necessary to ensure the safety of the Sappho’s Friends community.

The board will issue all decisions made from a “varsel” through consensus to ensure a fair process. All restricting or removing of a member from Sappho’s friends will be for a designated period with an opportunity to review at a later stage at a time deemed appropriate.

If you have questions about how to submit a “varsel” or want to discuss a situation in confidence, you can reach the board directly at: hello@sapphosfriends.no

6. Growth

We are all in different stages of unlearning oppressive conditioning. We encourage humility, curiosity, and compassion—both for ourselves and each other. Mistakes happen; accountability matters more than perfection.

Learning is part of liberation.

7. Feedback & Living Document Policy

These guidelines are not static. They will be reviewed regularly and updated in consultation with our community.

If you have suggestions, concerns, or want to help make our spaces more accessible or inclusive, we want to hear from you.

Contact: hello@sapphosfriends.no

v3 - last edited by Sara on 28-12-25 20:00

This version of the guidelines have been made more precise based on a workshop by the board of Sappho's Friends on the 13th of November 2025. Also found a typo in version 2 that needed to be fixed.